The Marriage to Khadîja
💍 The Marriage to Khadîja — Tranquility, Love, and Mercy
"And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them, and He placed between you affection and mercy"
— [Ar-Rûm: 21]
📖 Introduction
A Marriage Written by Allah
In the year 595 CE...
A poor orphan of twenty-five years married...
A wealthy noble lady of forty years...
A marriage that was not ordinary... but a divine preparation for the great mission to come!
But how did the story begin?
💼 The Business Partnership — The Beginning of the Story
🔊 A Reputation That Precedes Its Bearer
In Mecca... news spread of a poor young man who was truthful and trustworthy...
He worked in trade through mudharaba...
He did not cheat, did not betray, did not lie...
Khadija bint Khuwaylid heard about him — the foremost businesswoman of Mecca.
💎 Who Was Khadija in the Business World?
| Quality | Detail |
|---|---|
| Her Wealth | Among the richest in Mecca |
| Her Trade | Caravans traveling to Syria and Yemen |
| Her Method | She hired trustworthy men to trade with her money |
| Her Reputation | "At-Tahira" — noble and irreproachable |
🐪 The Journey to Syria — The Turning Point
📅 The Context
| Information | Detail |
|---|---|
| Year | Around 594-595 CE |
| Destination | Syria (Sham) |
| Goods | Khadija's merchandise |
| Traveler | Muhammad ﷺ (25 years old) |
| Witness | Maysara — Khadija's servant |
📜 How Did the Partnership Begin?
The Scene: In Mecca...
Khadija heard about the trustworthy young man, Muhammad ibn 'Abdillah...
She was told: "You have never hired anyone as honest as him!"
She sent him a proposal to travel with her trade to Syria...
And offered him double what she paid others!
Muhammad ﷺ accepted...
✨ What Maysara Saw on the Journey
Maysara, Khadija's servant, traveled with Muhammad ﷺ...
And observed him throughout the journey...
| What He Saw | Detail |
|---|---|
| Absolute Truthfulness | He did not lie in a single transaction |
| Complete Loyalty | He returned every dirham to its owner |
| Blessing | Khadija's trade made unprecedented profit! |
| Divine Protection | A cloud shaded him from the heat! |
| The Monk's Testimony | A monk in Syria said amazing things about him! |
📜 The Monk's Scene
When Muhammad ﷺ took shade under a tree near a monk's hermitage...
The monk came down and asked Maysara:
"Who is this man who has taken shade under this tree?"
Maysara said: "A man from Quraysh, from the people of the Sanctuary"
The monk said: "No one has ever taken shade under this tree except a prophet!"
📢 Maysara's Report to Khadija
Upon returning to Mecca:
Maysara sat before his mistress Khadija...
And told her everything he had seen:
"O my lady! I have never seen a man like him!"
"Truthful, trustworthy..."
"And we earned several times more than usual on this journey!"
"I saw a cloud shading him from the heat!"
"And the monk said only a prophet has ever shaded under that tree!"
His words fell upon Khadija's heart with great impact...
👩 Khadîja bint Khuwaylid — The First Mother of the Believers
🌟 Identity Card
| Information | Detail |
|---|---|
| Full Name | Khadîja bint Khuwaylid ibn Asad ibn 'Abd al-'Uzzâ |
| Tribe | Quraysh — Banû Asad |
| Title before Islam | At-Tâhira (the Pure One) |
| Title after Islam | Umm al-Mu'minîn (Mother of the Believers) |
| Birth | Around 555 CE |
| Death | 619 CE (Year of Sorrow) |
💎 Her Position in Quraysh
| Quality | Detail |
|---|---|
| Lineage | Among the noblest houses of Quraysh |
| Wealth | One of the wealthiest women of Mecca |
| Reputation | At-Tâhira — no reproach was ever known of her |
| Intelligence | Successful businesswoman |
| Beauty | Sought in marriage by Quraysh nobles |
💔 Her Previous Marriages
| Husband | Children |
|---|---|
| Abû Hâla at-Tamîmî | Hind ibn Abî Hâla (stepson of the Prophet ﷺ) |
| 'Atîq ibn 'Â'idh al-Makhzûmî | Hind bint 'Atîq |
💡 After the death of her two husbands: She refused marriage proposals from Quraysh nobles, until Muhammad ﷺ came!
💒 Details of the Blessed Marriage
📅 Essential Information
| Information | Detail |
|---|---|
| Year | 595 CE |
| Muhammad's ﷺ Age | 25 years |
| Khadîja's Age | 40 years (most common view), some say 28 years |
| Dowry | 20 young she-camels |
| Khadîja's Guardian | 'Amr ibn Asad (her uncle) |
| Proposers | Abû Tâlib and Hamza on behalf of Muhammad ﷺ |
📜 Scene of the Proposal
In Khadîja's House:
Abû Tâlib and Hamza gathered with 'Amr ibn Asad...
Abû Tâlib stood and said:
"Praise be to Allah who made us from the offspring of Ibrâhîm and the seed of Ismâ'îl..."
"Muhammad — my nephew — cannot be compared to any man of Quraysh without surpassing him!"
"If he has little wealth, wealth is a passing shadow"
"He has desire for Khadîja, and she has the same for him"
✅ The Acceptance
'Amr ibn Asad (Khadîja's uncle):
"This is a stallion whose nose cannot be refused!"
(Meaning: this noble man cannot be rejected!)
The marriage was celebrated with everyone's joy.
🏠 Married Life — A Model of Happiness
💝 A Relationship of Affection and Mercy
| Aspect | Manifestation |
|---|---|
| Mutual Respect | He ﷺ respected her and she respected him |
| Dialogue | He consulted her in his affairs |
| Trust | He entrusted her with his worries and secrets |
| Loyalty | He continued to mention her in good terms even after her death |
📜 Scenes from Their Life Together
Scene 1 — Material Support:
Khadîja placed all her wealth in her husband's hands...
She never told him: "This is my money!"
But rather: "My money is yours"
Scene 2 — Moral Support:
Muhammad ﷺ was contemplating the universe...
Searching for the truth...
And Khadîja encouraged and reassured him.
Scene 3 — Tranquility and Peace:
He ﷺ said after her death:
"She believed in me when people called me a liar, she sheltered me when people drove me away, and Allah granted me children through her"
[Reported by Ahmad]
👨👩👧👦 The Children — Fruits of Pure Love
📊 Table of Children
| Name | Gender | Note |
|---|---|---|
| Al-Qâsim | Boy | First-born, died young — hence the kunya "Abû l-Qâsim" |
| Zaynab | Girl | Eldest daughter, married Abû l-'Âs ibn ar-Rabî' |
| Ruqayya | Girl | Married 'Uthmân ibn 'Affân, emigrated with him to Abyssinia |
| Umm Kulthûm | Girl | Married 'Uthmân after Ruqayya's death (Dhû n-Nûrayn) |
| Fâtima | Girl | Master of the women of Paradise, married 'Alî |
| 'Abdullâh | Boy | Nicknamed at-Tayyib and at-Tâhir, died young |
💔 Loss of the Sons
📜 The Trial:
Al-Qâsim died in infancy...
Then 'Abdullâh died in infancy...
The polytheists mocked and said: "Muhammad is abtar!" (without progeny)
Allah revealed:
﴿ Indeed, your enemy is the one who is abtar ﴾ [Al-Kawthar: 3]
💡 The Lesson: Who said he was without progeny? His sons died, but his descendants through Fâtima have filled the earth!
👧 The Four Daughters — Jewels of Prophethood
| Daughter | Husband | Offspring |
|---|---|---|
| Zaynab | Abû l-'Âs ibn ar-Rabî' | 'Alî, Umâma |
| Ruqayya | 'Uthmân ibn 'Affân | 'Abdullâh (died young) |
| Umm Kulthûm | 'Uthmân ibn 'Affân | — |
| Fâtima | 'Alî ibn Abî Tâlib | Al-Hasan, Al-Husayn, Zaynab, Umm Kulthûm |
💡 Dhû n-Nûrayn: 'Uthmân ibn 'Affân was so called because he married two daughters of the Prophet ﷺ!
🕋 Reconstruction of the Kaaba — Muhammad's ﷺ Wisdom
📅 The Context
| Information | Detail |
|---|---|
| Year | 605 CE |
| Muhammad's ﷺ Age | 35 years |
| Cause | A violent flood had weakened the Kaaba's walls |
| Decision | Complete reconstruction |
⚔️ The Crisis of the Black Stone
📜 The Problem:
When they rebuilt and reached the placement of the Black Stone...
The tribes disputed: who would place it?
Every tribe wanted this honor!
The conflict lasted four days!
They brought a vessel of blood and dipped their hands in it — they nearly killed each other!
📜 The Brilliant Solution
Abû Umayya ibn al-Mughîra (the eldest):
"Take as arbiter the first one to enter through the mosque's gate!"
They accepted...
And the first to enter was: Muhammad ibn 'Abdillâh ﷺ!
They exclaimed: "It's Al-Amîn! We accept!"
The Solution:
He ﷺ asked for a cloth...
Placed the Stone in the middle...
Said: "Let each tribe take a side of the cloth!"
They all lifted it together...
Then he ﷺ took it with his hand and placed it in its spot!
📊 Meanings of the Incident
| Meaning | Significance |
|---|---|
| Trust | Quraysh was unanimous on his trustworthiness before Revelation |
| Wisdom | He resolved a crisis that could have sparked a war |
| Justice | He favored no tribe |
| Leadership | His leadership talents appeared early |
🏔️ Retreat in the Cave of Hirâ — Preparation for Revelation
📍 The Cave of Hirâ
| Information | Detail |
|---|---|
| Location | Mount an-Nûr (Light), northeast of Mecca |
| Distance | About 4 km from the Sacred Mosque |
| Altitude | 634 meters |
| Cave Size | Small, fits one or two people |
🧘 The Tahannuth
| Concept | Explanation |
|---|---|
| Tahannuth | Worship and meditation away from people |
| Duration | Successive nights (days and nights) |
| Provisions | He would stock up from Khadîja then return |
| Goal | Search for truth, meditation on the universe |
📜 What Did He Do in the Cave?
Meditation:
He ﷺ contemplated the sky and stars...
Meditated on the mountains and desert...
Asked himself: Who created this universe?
Rejected the worship of idols that neither harm nor benefit...
Searched for the true God...
Khadîja Supported Him:
She prepared food and water for him...
She did not object to his absences...
Rather, she encouraged him to seek the truth!
📊 Comparison: Before and After Marriage
| Aspect | Before Marriage | After Marriage to Khadîja |
|---|---|---|
| Material | Poor, worked through mudhâraba | Comfortable, Khadîja provided |
| Social | Orphan, no immediate family | Family man, home and children |
| Spiritual | Seeking truth | Time to meditate and worship |
| Emotional | Alone | Had support and a beloved |
🌟 Virtues of Khadîja — What No Other Woman Received
💎 Allah's Greeting to Her
Jibrîl said to the Prophet ﷺ:
"Here is Khadîja coming to you with a vessel containing food or drink. When she arrives, convey to her greetings from her Lord and from me, and give her glad tidings of a house in Paradise made of qasab (hollow pearls), where there will be no noise nor fatigue"
[Sahîh al-Bukhârî]
📊 What Only Khadîja Received
| Merit | Detail |
|---|---|
| Greeting from Allah | The only one to whom Allah sent a special greeting |
| Greeting from Jibrîl | Jibrîl sent her his salutations |
| House in Paradise | Made of qasab (hollow pearl) |
| First Believer | First human being to believe in the Prophet ﷺ |
| He did not marry over her | She remained his only wife for 25 years |
💬 The Prophet's ﷺ Praise of Her
He ﷺ said:
"The best of the women of her time was Maryam bint 'Imrân, and the best of the women of her time was Khadîja bint Khuwaylid"
[Sahîh al-Bukhârî]
And he ﷺ said:
"Many men have achieved perfection, but among women only these have achieved it: Âsiya wife of Pharaoh, and Maryam bint 'Imrân. And the virtue of 'Â'isha over women is like the virtue of tharîd over other foods"
[Sahîh al-Bukhârî]
💔 'Â'isha's Jealousy of Khadîja
'Â'isha رضي الله عنها said:
"I was not jealous of any of the Prophet's ﷺ wives as much as I was of Khadîja, even though I never saw her!"
"But the Prophet ﷺ used to mention her very often"
"Sometimes he would slaughter a sheep, cut it into pieces, and send them to Khadîja's friends"
"I would sometimes say to him: It's as if there was no other woman in the world but Khadîja!"
"He would say: She was such and such, and I had children from her"
[Sahîh al-Bukhârî]
📊 Timeline (Ages 25-40)
| Age | Event |
|---|---|
| 25 | Marriage to Khadîja |
| ~26 | Birth of al-Qâsim |
| ~27 | Birth of Zaynab |
| ~28 | Birth of Ruqayya |
| ~29 | Death of al-Qâsim |
| ~30 | Birth of Umm Kulthûm |
| ~32 | Birth of Fâtima |
| ~34 | Birth of 'Abdullâh |
| 35 | Black Stone incident |
| ~36 | Death of 'Abdullâh |
| ~37-40 | Retreat in the Cave of Hirâ |
| 40 | Descent of Revelation (next lesson) |
📝 Summary of Key Points
| Point | Remember |
|---|---|
| 1️⃣ | Married Khadîja in 595 CE at age 25 |
| 2️⃣ | Had 6 children (2 boys and 4 girls) |
| 3️⃣ | Both sons died in infancy (al-Qâsim and 'Abdullâh) |
| 4️⃣ | Resolved the Black Stone crisis with wisdom (age 35) |
| 5️⃣ | Began spiritual retreat in the Cave of Hirâ before Revelation |
| 6️⃣ | Khadîja was the first to believe in him |
❓ Questions for Reflection
-
Why did Khadîja remain his only wife for 25 years?
-
What was Khadîja's role in preparing the Prophet ﷺ for Revelation?
-
How can we apply the prophetic marriage model in our lives?
📚 Sources
| Book | Author |
|---|---|
| Sahîh al-Bukhârî | Hadiths about Khadîja |
| As-Sîra an-Nabawiyya | Ibn Hishâm |
| Ar-Rahîq al-Makhtûm | Al-Mubârakfûrî |
| Sayyidât Bayt an-Nubuwwa | 'Â'isha 'Abd ar-Rahmân |
| Al-Bidâya wa an-Nihâya | Ibn Kathîr |
In the next lesson: ⚡ The First Revelation — The Night that Changed History
And Allah knows best
رَبِّ زِدْنِي عِلْمًا